Have you ever had one of “those” days? No matter how hard you try, nothing goes your way? You KNOW you can turn it around, and things can only get better. But for the moment, you need to just sink into the poop pile and let it settle before having a panic attack?
I woke up yesterday and accomplished so much, I felt on top of the world. I even fit in an early morning jog with my dog followed by a shower, brunch with friends, meetings and conference calls. But today. Today was an entirely different story. Let’s just let the following list tell the story, shall we?
You know it’s going to be one of “those” days when:
– Your alarm clock goes off, and you forget to hit snooze.
– You have “mommy” insomnia and slept a whole 3 hours, so you’re BEYOND salvaging the day with a smile, hot tea and Tylenol.
– You look in the mirror and don’t recognize the crazy lady looking back at you.
– Your son forgets his water bottle and he has a cross country meet after school.
– You forget to wash your hair. And it shows.
– You forget to shower. And you realize that people in the check-out line at the grocery store could TOTALLY smell tell.
– You can feel a pimple forming in between your eyes. And it not only looks nasty, it hurts.
– Fabrez-ing your favorite pants isn’t going to cut it another week, so you throw in a wash with ALL of your pants. They all need to be air dried, so you essentially have nothing else to wear except an old pair that don’t fit in the crotch any more.
– While donning your least favorite outfit, topped with pillow hair, blood-shot eyes and a stain on your shirt, you run into the best-dressed mom in town. And once again, she gives you that “look” that you’re pretty sure could kill a rodent.
– Your new laptop that’s a whole 80 hours old appears to die in your arms after accidentally falling for a “restore your PC” prompt, and the man from Toshiba’s customer service line says it cannot be saved. So you try not to take your hormone-induced anger out on him even though you do it anyway.
– Your friend and IT consultant saves the day and your laptop, so all is well, except you totally missed a workout, and hours of work, so now you feel bloated and unproductive.
– You catch up on work and thank God you were able to salvage all your files, but glancing at the clock you realize the kids will be home in approximately 12 minutes. Son of a …..
– You call it a day and pray you don’t burn dinner.
You see, my husband has a quick, dry wit. He likes to use Valentine’s Day as an opportunity to give me the cheesiest Infomercial-inspired gag gift possible. Through the years, he has given me a Snuggie (with a free reading light), Pajama Jeans, roses from the gas station, an As Seen on TV-featured “Ahh Bra” and the Time/Life Country Love Songs collection, which I still keep (and play) in my car…to everyone’s dismay.
Venting Sessions 