I may occasionally break down when I see baby pictures of my kids.
I may have a “moment” when I remember that my son recently became a teenager. Gulp.
I may sometimes obsess over my kids like the “Smother” in TV’s The Goldbergs (minus the 1980’s AquaNet-hair).
But I have a little secret to share with you.
It has taken me a dozen years, 1,000 sleepless nights, 300-some-odd tantrums, hundreds of cups of green tea, a dozen birthday parties, a dumpster-worth of diapers, 457 trips to Target, and thousands of vats of dark chocolate, but I’ve made it through the poop storm of motherhood.
I’ve finally reached MomoPause.
MOMOPAUSE
Not menopause, but MomoPause.
That Sweet Spot in a mother’s life. The calmer years between toddlerhood and true teenagery. (And yes, I made up that word.) That time when you can actually travel with your kids and, oh I’m writing it out loud, ENJOY the trip. When you can go to the bathroom by yourself for five minutes…in peace. That pause where no one pees or poops on you or in front of you.
And….your kids still like you.
I know it may not last long. It may disappear in the morning. But I’m enjoying every second, let me tell you.
The sweet spot isn’t just a myth.
Oh, it’s real. So fantabulous, I think I may be dreaming.
You know you’ve reached MomoPause when:
– You can actually carry on a phone conversation without hitting the mute button every five seconds.
– You don’t have kids hanging off of you, yelling “Mommy, mommy, mommy” every time you go shopping.
– You no longer get wicked looks from other passengers when you sit your kids next to them on a plane.
– You can take your kids out to a restaurant and actually finish dinner…together.
– You have time to wash AND condition your hair.
– You don’t show up to business meetings with spit up on your sleeve.
– You wake up to an alarm clock.
– Your youngest can take a shower by herself (and it doesn’t make you nervous).
– You can enjoy a family movie that’s not animated.
– You remember what “quiet” sounds like.
– Your kids no longer cling to you, but they’re not appalled by you either.
– You look back on even the most insane mommy moments with a great big smile because you know they were special, and you treasure all of them, but you’re also relieved that some of the tough years are behind you. Although you realize some very tough years are in front of you, deep inside, you know that because of what you’ve been through, you can get through anything…and it’s not a crime to pause and smell the roses right now.
Ferris Bueller’s Day Off is one of my favorite John Hughes’ movies and I was tickled pretty in pink when my kids wanted to watch it on a recent family movie night. We had one of those weekends packed with so many activities (including celebrating my first born’s 13th birthday), we actually needed a touch of “Bueller, Bueller” to help balance things out. And yes, I did break down when I looked through my son’s baby pictures and turned to see a man-child of 13 years standing before me. Oh boy, it’s starting. Thankfully, he’s a good kid. Very sweet. But the fact that he didn’t want to blow out 13 candles in front of his friends made me feel like he’s already 16! My baby! It’s going fast. It’s only a matter of time before we’ll be shopping for college dorm supplies. And I digress. (I’m still in shock that I’m officially a mother of a teen, so thank you for allowing me to keep rambling so I can stay in this state of perpetual mommy denial a little longer.) So anyhoo, I thoroughly enjoyed the fact that my kids “get” Ferris. The “righteous dude” is a witty, playful, grab-high-school-by-the-car-horns genius. We fear him and adore him simultaneously. That unsung hero that none of us, even in our totally-on-sale Forenza jeans and 1980’s bi-level hair-cut, were brave enough to even try to be.
My cheeks hurt. And I’m grinning from ear to ear. Not just from seeing chocolate bunnies everywhere, or the fact that my grandmother celebrated her 87th birthday or the fact that we have another five birthdays to celebrate in the week ahead. (Oh, Lordy, all I ask is that I can get through the next 12 days in good health and NO frosting-induced migraine.) I’m honored and thrilled to be the featured author interviewed by Mike Squatrito of the 
Venting Sessions 