- As soon as you spot a public Ladies Room, you go…just in case.
- 9 p.m. used to be the time you’d go out with friends. Now it’s the time you head to bed.
- When a friend has to cancel plans because her child is sick, you secretly look forward to putting on your PJ pants and watching Netflix.
- You no longer work out so you can eat more, you work out so you will not feel like cow dung the next day.
- When you don’t eat right, you pay for it. All. Week. Long.
- You used to walk into a room of strangers and care what they thought of you, and now you wonder to yourself, “Do I really care about any of these people?”.
- When you don’t get enough sleep, you wake up feeling like you’ve been hit by a frying pan, your eyes turn into slits and you secretly wish you could stay in bed. All. Day. Long.
- About the time you finally get used to Facebook, you realize “kids these days” are using Twitter more often than FB.
- You use the term “kids these days” without even realizing it.
Courtesy of http://www.cemcor.ubc.ca/
- Nursing a hangover takes more than a nap and a cheeseburger.
- Your new mid-life hangover remedy: Multiply the number of drinks you have by .5 to find out how many days you need to feel normal again. (If tequila is involved, count on doubling that formula.)
- You wake up in a pool of sweat almost every day.
- Five hours of continuous sleep is like a God-send.
- Your neck is sore not because you went hang-gliding but because you “slept on it wrong”.
- Random injuries keep getting lamer and lamer, and more frequent than you care to admit.
- You have come to terms with the fact that you can never do jumping jacks again without peeing a little.
- You wear a panty liner just in case you sneeze.
- And last but not least: You sneeze loudly just in case you pass gas simultaneously.
Venting Sessions 