I don’t know about you, but I enjoy mulling over something for a bit and then finding a solution. I like to chit-chat with my grandmother about it. Then a good friend. It’s the way I’m wired. If I need to vent about something, my husband (I love you, honey, I just need to get this out) searches for a solution. Immediately. Are all men wired this way? Sometimes, I just want to talk about it first. To mull it over, brainstorm and vent a bit.
So much research has been done about women and their internal “talk about it” button. If my memory serves me correctly, my inner venter never really turned on until I became a mother. I love my kids. But there are times when I don’t have the capacity to search for a solution – I just need to vent.
For example, I’ll say to my husband, “I’m having a tough time writing with the kids around today.”
“Then move the computer to another room.”
“But the kids need me around today; and it’s easier if I’m downstairs. Plus I’m on deadline.”
“I guess I can’t help you.”
Maybe I like writing with the kids around, but I’m actually secretly wishing there were more times when he’d take off with them so I could get stuff done without anyone home. Then I could take a Calgon bath, watch re-runs of Pretty Little Liar, Sex and the City, eat cereal over the sink and dance in the kitchen with my dog.
And I digress.
When I need to vent, I could care less about finding a solution immediately. I don’t need to go back to the grocery store and tell off the 19-year-old check-out girl with the tattoo covering her left arm for giving me dirty looks as my daughter hangs over the shopping cart. I just want to be able to let off some steam before my hormones bubble up in spurts throughout the week.
Some may see it as empty venting; I call it free therapy.:)
Kristin Wheeler (@MamaLuvsBooks) said:
I have to coach my hubby on how to react when I tell him things. He’s become better at just listening! =)
Mother's Circle - Leah DeCesare said:
Girlfriends need girlfriends!! 🙂 We get it!
Mary Larsen (@Mary__Larsen) said:
Venting makes us happier overall 🙂 I wish more people felt comfortable doing it!
Candice ⚓ (@TheNewModernMom) said:
Um, yea. If I mention something to the hubby he is all Mr. Problem-solver. Annoying! I am totally a venter. Its like breathing right?
Lisa @bitesforbabies said:
I’ve always been a venter…I vent to my husband, mom, friends, sometimes my dog! Lol! It IS free therapy..it feels so better just to get it all out 😉
Jessica Collins Grimes said:
Lol – I live the phrase “free therapy”! If its any consolation, my husband is the same way 🙂
Thank you, thank you, thank you ALL for speaking your minds in here!
melissa weintraub (@dentistmel) said:
Vent away my friend!!! I do the same as you- my husband hears the brunt of it though!!! Venting is good for you!!!
Jen Coelho Senecal said:
A girl needs to vent. And talk. And just have someone else listen and nod and say, “you’re right.” Is that so hard? LOL. I will admit that I totally do the same to my husband, though, in that I try to find solutions the minute he has a problem. HOWEVER, men are different creatures and they’re looking for answers. So this is totally acceptable in my book. For me, I just want him to make me popcorn and tell me it’s OK to yap my mouth off. 🙂
I TOTALLY get it, girl!! You’ve always got us Rhody girls to vent to!!
See??! I KNEW you ladies would understand. Thank you! My husband is a wonderful guy and I appreciate him every day, but sometimes, I don’t need a solution. I just need to let it out!! And thanks, Michelle – I appreciate it more than you could ever know!
I love this topic! Men are just wired differently. My Mom (a psychologist) taught me that, which is why I have a few awesome close friends- we VENT to each other often. And I bring the things my hubby can solve to his attention- that way I’m not wasting my breath or his time. Sometimes, I just wish he GOT IT, though!
…and me, I’m the one with tattoos and the kid who is squealing like a pterodactyl and people stare at like I’m single handed-ly ruining this country (me and my pickles!)… You should ask the cashier if she wants to take a picture, say “Don’t judge it til you’re there, sister,” and wheel it on out 🙂 lol.
Love this post… You can always vent to me. 🙂
Stephanie Kay (@stephmommybrain) said:
lol! Ah… husband’s and their need to problem solve. Sometimes I just want someone to agree with me that the situation was annoying! 🙂
I now what you mean~ hubby’s just love to help solve the problems! Sweet, but not always what we want right away 🙂
i agree w/you about venting being free therapy… but i don’t think therapists would. 🙂